Daft Funk's West Coast Musings

By Rich Funk

It's Friday, so you know what that means...right? It means that I've slacked off long enough and so now I'm bringing you the highlights of what's happening on the West Coast.*

*TRANSLATION: I can't think of anything else to write about.

Cue up the Ron Burgundy: "Here's what's happening in your world...today.
  • Yesterday against the Cubs, Greg Maddux failed to deliver his much anticipated 351st career win. One has to wonder if the pressure of winning #351 is getting to Maddux. Remember how hard it was for him to get to 350 and all the media attention he got every time he took the mound? Well this one is much harder. It's...well, it's one game harder. It's one more difficult. And this amp goes up to 11.
  • The Indians completed a sweep of the A's yesterday. You gotta feel for the Athletics. They hit Cleveland at the worst time. How often do starting pitchers go an entire week without giving up a run? I especially feel bad for Greg Smith. The rookie lost his third straight start yesterday. Over his last 4 starts, he's only given up 10 earned runs in 24.2 innings (a respectable ERA of 3.65) with 26 strikeouts...and he's 0-3.
  • Question Of The Week: Are the Giants better than we thought, or is the rest of the NL West just that bad? Right now, the Giants are ahead of both the Padres and Rockies in the standings and are a surprising 11-11 at home. But their record may be deceiving; the Giants are 8-8 against the equally terrible West and 6-16 against the rest of the NL.
  • There really is no in-between with the Dodgers' Chad Billingsley. He's either great or not-so-great. In 10 starts this season, Chad's given up one earned run or less 6 times and given up 4 or more runs 4 times. I guess it doesn't matter if he wins or if he loses, as long as he does whatever he does all the way. Go big or go home, right broham? I feel like a tool just typing that...
  • The Lakers gotta win tonight in Utah to put their series away. I love watching the crowd whenever games are in Utah. There was a woman in a courtside seat in Game 3 that was seriously wearing an ankle-length dress. In LA, I don't think girls in courtside seats are allowed to cover more than 40% of their body.
  • The Angels...still annoy the piss out of me. What a dull and boring team. In fact, the mere thought of them boils my blood so much that I can't write any more.
That's all. Apologies to Seattle, but we're all out of time.