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Last week, I wrote a piece offering Travis Buck some
advice that might help him bust out of his hitting slump. After I posted it, Buck hit over .400 in the Toronto series. I think he's only gotten like 2 hits since the Toronto series, but whatever...let's focus on the positive...
So now I've decided to offer my advice to Rich Harden. He's landed on the DL
again, and this routine is really starting to get old. So after thinking long and hard* about what Mr. Harden can do to stay healthy on a regular basis, I have come up with a brilliant** suggestion:
Rich Harden, you need to grow some facial hair...
I know what you're thinking: "E-Claire, that suggestion is almost as ridiculous as your pastry-themed blog title!" But here's why it makes sense...
Let's take a look at some of Oakland's hairy pitchers...
Joe Blanton...
I can't remember him ever being on the DL, and he rocks facial hair....
Chad Gaudin...
Yes, he had offseason surgery, but he and his facial hair have recovered, and he's made a couple of starts. Were they great starts? No. But at least he's out there pitching, and as far as I know, he didn't leave either game with "stiffness," "soreness," "tightness," or any other mystery ailment.
Another A's pitcher with facial hair? Dan Haren...
Ok - so he was traded to the Diamondbacks, but last year, he and his facial hair had a great season...He started the All Star game for the AL, and was a Cy Young candidate for a good portion of the year! And he didn't get hurt!
Dana Eveland got the facial hair memo...He doesn't want to get hurt during his rookie season...
So there you go, Rich. If you want to bust out of your injury rut, try growing some facial hair. What do you have to lose?
*
Actually, this idea was conceived during a commercial break while I was watching "Happy Gilmore." Somebody's closer!
** I am aware that this suggestion is not that brilliant.
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Rich Harden made his 7th straight start yesterday since coming off the DL, and it was another gem - my second favorite Canadian (Neil Young will always be #1) pitched 6 innings of one-hit ball, striking out nine and not giving up a run. This was his sixth straight quality start.
That's all fine and well, but what disturbed me about yesterday's game was this:
Rich Harden has shaved off his facial hair! And for the 4 of you who have been reading this blog, you know that Harden has managed to remain injury-free after coming off the DL sporting a goatee.
Now before you tell me "E-Claire, I highly doubt that a few face whiskers are keeping Rich Harden off the DL," chew on this: Harden admitted that he wasn't feeling "
100 percent" after his last start against the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim in Orange County down the street from a Del Taco. And Bob Geren said that Harden's pitch count was being monitored yesterday.
Dana Eveland, Alan Embree, Joe Blanton, Chad Gaudin...You guys need to sit down with Harden and explain the importance of facial hair...It'll be a "goatee intervention" of sorts. And if he resists, simply show him this:
No facial hair = injury prone
Facial Hair = Hall of Fame
By ,
In case you haven't been keeping score, Rich "I'm made of glass" Harden made his fourth straight start since coming off the DL earlier this month. It's the first time he's made 4 starts in a row since the beginning of the 2006 season.
So...To what do we owe this pleasant surprise? I think it's the facial hair.
Let's take a look at the facts for this season:
Rich Harden, before facial hair: 2 starts, 1 trip to the DL
Rich Harden, after facial hair: 4 starts (3 of which went 6 innings or more), no trips to the DL (yet)
What have we learned here? I am a
genius.
Greg Smith...Let this be a warning:
If you want to have a fruitful and injury-free season, you'd better start growing something on that chin. And lose the necklace, please...
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The starting pitcher for the A's today was...Rich Harden?
Yes, Harden made his first start today since being placed on the DL with a shoulder strain. He has made 6 trips to the DL over the last 4 seasons. Apparently, it's very "Hard"en for him to stay healthy. Zing!
Anyway, Harden's start was, in a word, blah. He gave up 5 runs in 3 2/3 innings, and seemed to have control problems, considering he walked 4 guys. The A's did win the game, though (Casilla got the win). And Harden did have 5Ks.
At this point, all we can do is hope that Harden doesn't wake up tomorrow with some kind of tightness or soreness.
However, what was impressive about Harden's start today was his sweet facial hair. A while back, I had suggested that Harden grow some facial hair as a last-ditch effort to stay healthy. Today, he showed up looking like this:
It's good to see that Rich Harden is a fan of SFWH, and hopefully his new face fur will bring him good health for the rest of the season*
* Yes, I just typed "Rich Harden" and "good health" in the same sentence.
