103 to go: The Dodgers are Torture Porn

By Governor X

After a terrible road trip, the Dodgers returned home to get well against the worst team in baseball, the Colorado Rockies. Of course, by "get well" I mean "hit rock bottom".

With the pitching staff finally looking like they know what they're doing, the bats went to sleep and the Dodgers lost two of three. Brad Penny managed to not give up five runs Tuesday night, but because of the offense, he still couldn't win his first game in a month. In a Wednesday afternoon game that five people saw, a perfectly good outing by Clayton "We Card" Kershaw was wasted as the team could muster only one run.

Cubs are next and Rod Blagojevich never put his broom away after that debacle in Chicago last week. Good news for LA though: they have to get better and the Cubs have to get worse. Sorry Cubs Nation, but no team is going to ride Ryan Prom Night Dempster Baby to a World Series title.

Highlights from the series with Colorado:

Monday: Dodgers win and Jeff Kent cuts up the nerf football those "damn kids" keep throwing on his lawn.

Tuesday: Matt Kemp picks a fight with Yorvit Torrealba and ends up making him do wrong things.

Wednesday: The game starts at noon, sparing employed Dodger fans the pain of watching another loss to the hapless Rockies.